So long, farewell.

Goodbye kimchi and 'anyung haseo' and 'kamsahamnida'.  Goodbye Baekjae Samgyetang and Anyang Ilshim Gyohae and OK!  Goodbye kimchi bokumbop and chamchi and bibimbap and mekju, juseyo. Goodbye girls in shorts and tights and heels and man bags and Chucks and bowl cuts.  Goodbye hot Korean boys and giggly Korean girls. Goodbye efficient public transportation and crowded subways and social sleepers. Goodbye cheap cell phone service and public television watching (even in the movie theater bathrooms!) and street food and 700 won bus rides.  Goodbye kick ass Korean rest stops and express buses and weekend getaways and festivals and national monuments.  Goodbye 'Dokdo is a Korea land' and melamin and crazy cows.  Goodbye acid rain and tiny cardigans and fold-up bikes and Mona Risa.  Goodbye ajummas and ajoshis and visors and urban hikers and playing with yer feet at dinner.  Goodbye communal dining and banchan and "service-uh" and the Sound of Vitality. Goodbye street socks and subway shopping and free size and no last call and peanut butter squid.  Goodbye panda hats and skinny jeans and sexual ambiguity and androgyny.  Goodbye holding hands and public nudity and love motels. Goodbye precocious and inquisitive students, "Teacher but," chewies, and Best in Class.  Goodbye Yura and Dongwook. Goodbye Take It and Make it Rain and Matt's Abs and Good for Wellbeing and Nice-uh.  Goodbye public drunkenness, feral cats, bench "nappers", stripes, Paris Baguette and Tous Les Jours.  Goodbye GS and Family Mart and Buy the Way.  Goodbye dorm life and 300 square feet and walking to work.  Goodbye shameless vanity and Krazy Korean mothers and absent Korean fathers.  Goodbye Friday morning coffee run and Weekend at Sunny's. Goodbye floor heat, "shit, shower, shave AND cook", wet naps, and sun porches. Goodbye whitebeaters and encoves and spics and rotator cups. (Love you Ellen.)  Goodbye "Nice to meet you" and "Where are you prom?" Goodbye ramen and Binch and Choco Digest cookies.  Goodbye looking like a high class call girl on a Sunday afternoon. Goodbye shiny suits and "Koreanized" shoes and minifridges.  Goodbye Wonder Girls and Girl's Generation and Rain and JYP and K-Pop ripoffs. Goodbye Clubby Bar Slang and Black Music Bar and Psycho and Uncle Don's and Beer Valley and convenience store drinking. Goodbye Anyang and Hongdae and Insadong and Gangnam and Myeong Dong and the stop of no return: Namtaeryang.  Goodbye Itaewon and Hooker Hill and Gecko's and The Red Door. Goodbye amazing nugae bars and rice cooker cakes and egg bread and red pepper paste. Goodbye B-Boys and dance offs and emo glasses.  Goodbye Korean snacking. (That one really deserves its own post.)  Goodbye Norae bangs and PC bangs and hookah.  Goodbye tiny trashcans and squatters and "one shot" and rock, scissor, paper. Goodbye Kim and Park and Lee.  Goodbye napping bosses, impromptu public photo shoots and 5000 won avocados. Goodbye groupthink and homogeneity and Lee Myung Bak and nationalism.

Goodbye Koreasoning.

Hello Taco Bell and dryers. 

Planes, trains and longtail boats.

Traveling wears me out. I'm currently sitting at a computer in Ko Phi Phi waiting for the long adventure home to begin. I've got lotsa stories to tell, but the internets on this island heaven don't come cheap.

Smell ya later!

Baby D turns 1!

Happy Birthday Baby D!!  

Today is my nephew, Derek's,  first birthday and I am feeling bittersweet.  On the one hand I'm SO proud of the parents my brother and Jessica have become. They have become responsible and attentive and parental beyond my wildest dreams. They made a REALLY good egg.  

However, I am sad.  Derek was born 3 weeks before I left the States, so I haven't had the chance to really get to know him.  Our interactions consist of me cooing and laughing and playing peekaboo to the webcam on Sunday nights.  I can only imagine what he thinks of Aunt Mindy...

Isn't he cute?

So much for diplomacy

WTF?!  The Kims are effing crazy.

Bull Fighting OR BullS Fighting?

This weekend I went to a bullfight. Or rather, I went to see some bulls fight. As in no matador, no cape, and very little blood and gore. In Korea, the bulls are trained to fight each other -- a kinder, gentler bullfight, if you will. Fine by me. Animal blood and gore (not to mention human blood and gore) seriously gross me out, so watching two bulls battle, literally, head to head was gross-out free, if a little anti-climactic.

And I got to ride the train. Hooray for bar cars.

These two ladies took pictures of themselves for a good 20 minutes on the ride home. Damn Korean vanity.

Bulls fighting, Cheongdo.

Intense, right?!

Bulls fighting.

Ellen and I were like the bull paparazzi.

Amy, Ellen, me, Erica and Jeff at Haeundae Beach.

Amy, Ellen and me rockin' the Kanyes.

Party at U2.

Norae Bang in the bar car!!

The were less than thrilled to have their picture taken.  Now they know how we feel...

One more reason I heart Yura Han

I am sick. As in put my head in a vice, I can't stop shivering, goddamn these multiple trips to the bathroom in an hour kinda sick. So I'm home.

I woke up this morning (or maybe it was last night) to my phone ringing and vibrating under my pillow.

Me- Hello (in my sickest and most pathetic voice.)

Little voice on the other end- Mindy Teacher, why are you sick?

Me- Yura, is that you?  

Yura- Yes.  Why are you sick?  When will you be better?  I miss you Mindy Teacher.

Me- I miss you too, Yura.  I don't know why I'm sick.  Maybe I will be better on Wednesday.

Yura- Okay.  My mother wants to talk to you.

Oh. My. Sweet. Jesus.  How stinkin' cute is she?  

After our short conversation, Yura's mom got on the line and asked me the same line of questions. Then she said she is sad for me as I am sick in a country with no family and no one to take care of me.  I assured her that my friends have been looking after me and I'll prolly survive.  Oh, she was having none of that.  She asked me if I'd seen the doctor, if I had any ginseng tea and if I knew where Baekje Samgyetang was located.  No to the doctor and ginseng and yes to the smelly Korean chicken soup restaurant, I answered.  Then she suggested a regime for my recovery.  First, she would send some ginseng tea to school with Yura for Tracy to bring to me.  Next, order the stuffed ginseng chicken from Baekje Samgyetang, a third of which I would eat now, and the remainder I could freeze for a later date.  Finally, visit the doctor.  Then I would be better.

She was so caring and concerned for my wellbeing (wellbeing is VERY important in Korea), that I could hardly argue with anything she said.  So now I await my ginseng tea delivery.

Korean kids know weird stuff

I'm a little obsessed with the Peter Bjorn and John song 'Young Folks'. As such, I have been forcing it down my kids' throats for the past week or so.  It's a good song -- chill beat and lots of whistling, and the video is pretty cool too.

On Monday night I pulled the video up and hit play while my kids worked on some workbook BS. And then a funny thang happened -- when it got to the chorus one of my KOREAN FOURTH GRADERS started to sing along. I was totally astounded and taken aback. How could it be that this Korean child is hip to some chill Swedish indie tunes, especially surrounded by the krap that is *most* K-Pop?! (My Wonder Girls are excluded, of course.) 

"Teacher, Nintendo," he says.  Ahhh, of course.  Apparently Peter Bjorn and John were featured on the FIFA 08 video game soundtrack, along with a bunch  of other artists from around the world. 

Nintendo: Making the world a smaller place, one gamer at a time. Pretty cool.